I have always been pro-choice. I believe we always have a choice somehow. We may not like the options, but we do have the chance to pick one of these really bad options, and that by itself is choice.
So what are the options now?
1-Death:
That is not an option. That is not a wish, not even a thought. But I can’t deny it’s a source of some deep bitter relief. Relief, that’s a nice word!
2- Coma:
Better than losing life is losing consciousness. This way you still have a chance of coming back. I have always envied those who faint, this amazing ability to just press on pause on your brain and soul, and then come back.
What an amazing way to live!
But then I realized that I don’t actually know what he who is in coma feels. How do I make sure that he is not aware of what is going on? That he doesn’t feel the same as he used to feel while being awake but this time he even can’t really do anything.
That’s a scary thought!
3- Drugs:
No no, not this kind of drugs. The other kind, the prescription legal kind, I heard they help. But I also heard they make you numb, feel nothing. You’re not miserable anymore, but you’re not joyful either. You’re nothing!
You just sit right there knowing there was something inside and now it’s just a void. Void, that’s a very bad word!
4-Hope:
You know this weird senseless very annoying voice at the deep back of your head? That persistent stubborn child that hangs on to your arms and keeps on pulling you somewhere you don’t know assuring you that where he is taking you is fun? You neither know who he, what he wants, nor where he wants to take you.
Nah! That’s for fairytales, that’s not a real option!
5-Faith:
Now that what makes hope real. Faith, no wonder my name in English is translated to that. Since right exactly now, this seems to be the only option I have that is not scary or blurry. Faith is real, and it makes every other thing as real as it is. The trick about it is that you have to hold on to it real tight for some long time before you can actually get anything.
Faith makes death an option of defeat, coma an option of despair, drugs an option of weakness and it makes this annoying voice louder and louder till you start hearing yourself repeating the words … “It’ll all be all right”
Sometimes I feel really jealous of those who lose consciousness and succeed in letting go. Sometimes I really wish from the bottom of my heart that I had it in me to just let go. But I always owe it to my faith that even though pain usually compresses my chest that I can hardly breath, even though fear has taken a comfortable sofa right in the middle of my heart, and even though I can hardly find any flavor in any beauty in the world, I know deep inside, that someday, this kid will take me somewhere fun!
Action: Eight female journalists working for Al Jazeera network signed an official complaint against Deputy Editor Ayman Jaballah, stating that they have been harassed by his comments on their appearance.
Reaction: The network ordered an investigation.
Then:
Time: Last month.
Action: The network reported it was within its legal rights to dictate the appearance of its on-air presenters.
Reaction: Five of the eight presenters quit in protest.
The Long version:
Lina Zahreddine, one of the five Al Jazeera presenters to resign. Image via Al Jazeera.
In an action that was described as first of its kind in the world of Arab satellite channels, last January eight female presenters for the Al Jazeera network filed an official complaint against Ayman Jaballah, a deputy editor known for his conservative views and his ties to the Muslim Brotherhood .... More
CAIRO: Reem is a 21-year-old Egyptian woman who recently graduated from university and is looking forward to the future. A degree in hand, she is readying herself for success. But like the vast majority of women in Egypt, she was the victim of a sexual assault that took place in Egypt’s many public spaces: on the bus.
She told Bikya Masr the story of the incident, and more shockingly, what the police did – rather did not do – in response.
When Doha had to jump out of her cab three times after being assaulted by the drivers in broad daylight, she knew she had to do something about it. So she has joined a growing number of women in Lebanon who speak out against sexual harassment.
I am not very fond of symbols when they come to women, but today I have to. This idea crossed my mind when I was shopping for groceries few days ago. I usually categorize them into items that are always needed so we have to have extras and spares of, items that are better be found when needed so just remembering having them is good, and the rest of the stuff that are really no big deal.
Then it crossed my mind!
We, women, are like spices! Yea!
The “Salt” woman; She is the one you have to have at home, can’t enjoy a meal without her except if you’re either a weirdo or someone with no taste buds. In case you run out of her, you freak out. Because even deserts have a tiny salt portion. You really can’t live with her. But unfortunately, as necessary as she is, one by time can easily forget she exits. Salt women are tender, forgiving, sweet, fun, but they are always taken for granted. They are hardly appreciated and as long as they are available, they are seen as dispensable.
The “Hot Spicy” woman; She is all about fun, lots of fun. Actually sometimes she is just what it takes to make the meal “perfect”. BUT, she’s never a home ingredient, once you keep her on the shelf, you start talking too much of her, till you finally get bored. The thing about this woman is novelty, adventure and suspense. By having her at home, she automatically loses all that flavor of hers. She is the weekend, summer trip, one night stand woman, and she can’t be anything else.
Then there’s the “Pepper” woman; the one that as important as she is, she is still not taken for granted. There are some meals that can’t be eaten without it. Each of us has these one or two dishes that have to be eaten with lots of pepper. She is kept at home with gratitude. I personally can’t have eggs unless they are blackish from how much pepper put onto them. She is as necessary as salt, but not taken for granted.
Now this is a smart woman. Don’t hold on to the exact example, call yourself “pepper”, “lemon” or whatever. Just find your way between being “important with no fun” and “just all about the fun”. A smart woman is a proud one, she is supportive but not in a nanny or mommy way. She is indispensable but not bitchy. She is enjoyable but not playable. She is so proud not to be appreciated and so secure to show love, care, and need.
Don’t fall into the salty trap, believe me, you won’t be valuable. Don’t brag about being the hot spice of his life, because you’ll never know what he has for breakfast, if you manage to get to his home.
A smart woman “loves” herself, and knows she only deserves to be loved the same way in return. Don’t underestimate yourself or accept justifications for being loved less than what you really “know” you deserve.
In a reversal of Egypt’s recent trends regarding women in the judiciary, Egypt’s State Council voted this month to ban the appointment of female judges to the council. Despite the fact that Tahani El Gebaly was appointed to be Egypt’s first female judge in 2003, and 31 more women were appointed as judges in 2007, 334 of the 376 council judges voted in favor of the ban. Though Egypt’s Supreme Court has since overturned the ban, the subject has created an intense debate.
Dr. Zeinab Radwan, Council at People’s ...read more
I was thrilled when I heard that Oprah Winfrey interviewed Egyptian women about marriage for an episode of her show about marriage around the globe. Oprah has always been such an inspiration for a lot of women, me included. I was so excited for her to highlight my world and how women like me get married and the challenges we face.
Naturally, the episode has grabbed a lot of attention. The guest list included:
When I admire the wonders of a sunset or the beauty of the moon, my soul expands in the worship of the creator ~ Gandhi
“Be the change you want to see in the world.” Gandhi
“First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.” - Gandhi
The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others. Gandhi
Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and everything will be well. Gandhi
Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes. Gandhi
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.Gandhi
Honest differences are often a healthy sign of progress.Gandhi
Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.Gandhi
In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth. Gandhi
One needs to be slow to form convictions, but once formed they must be defended against the heaviest odds.Gandhi
Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.Gandhi
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.Gandhi
When I despair, I remember that all through history the ways of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it--always.Gandhi
You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.Gandhi
Freedom is not worth having if it does not connote freedom to err. It passes my comprehension how human beings, be they ever so experienced and able, can delight in depriving other human beings of that precious right.Gandhi, 1931
On January 30th, 1948, he was walking slowly from his home to attend a prayer meeting when a thirty-nine years old Hindu called Nathuram Godse who mistakenly thought Gandhi was harming the Hindus by being friendly to Muslims shot the Great Soul after respectfully bowing to him. A few minutes later a man came out to the waiting crowd and announced that the little old man who sacrificed with all he had for his country, who reshaped the lives of many, who changed the path of the world, who inspired -and still will inspire- mankind till the end of the world was dead.
I had to leave my room, my desk and my PC to do this. I made me a huge mug of Nescafe, some (Boksomat) and took my pen and papers outside of my room, put my legs on the window to enjoy the sun, and had the fun of watching our nice street before being occupied by the students of the High Institute of Social Services. And finally, my mp3 was playing the Soundtrack!
Three days before watching AVATAR for the first time –yes, I watched it more than once-, I was thinking about James Cameron. I didn’t know back then he’s the director, and I had this thought; “What can he possible do after Titanic?” I was wondering how some people know success only once in their life but they know it really well, that’s it’s hard to do it again. After all, what can he possible do after Titanic?
But obviously I was wrong. And I watched AVATAR to make sure of that!
In short, this movie is all what cinema as in art is about for me. This is what I call motion picture. And this is exactly why I am crazy about this art.
Let’s take it bit by bit, ok?
The Story:
Yes, I’m not going to start with the 3D mega technology big words. Cause this movie is about the story mainly. James Cameron –who is the writer by the way- gave us a story that included all the details and symbols that Mr. Cameron has been trying (and for me succeeding) to highlight since Titanic.
. We as humans do not own the world
.We are just a part of it.
.A lot of other creatures do exist and they share this world with us.
.And yes, there’s an upper power above all this. Who created all this, and created all of us!
The “energy” dialogue; all this talking which was about energy being stored in each and every living creature bonded by earth via this amazing synaptic network.
The beauty that was in every scene in all kind vs. the pure ugliness in anything related to human! Look how ugly all these aircrafts, machines, weapons and even robots. Couldn’t the movie makers get us the most impressive robots? Of course they could, but it was intended. Because no matter how hard we try to deny it, there’s nothing pretty or nice about this. Putting it into comparison with the beautiful colorful inspirational paradise was to the point. I never wanted to the cameras to get out this place. I wanted the entire movie to be there. This beauty that was available for us human to enjoy. But because some of us are so greedy and stupid, they thought they own it, and they have the right to get any use out of it, in whatever way even if it means killing anything we put our hands on. They had to destroy cultures & beliefs, they had to mock their sacred values and underestimate their power. And that because of course, they were not like them!
Politics:
I don’t think its coincidence but I still believe some Americans are not yet over what happened with the Indians. There was this “guilty” vibe that I got through watching the movie. The fact that that land was built on the blood of its original people and the wreckage of a culture that was once there!
In the movie there’s an amazing quote;
“If you have something they want, they make you their enemy, so that it’s OK for them to fight you and take it!”
Yea, it’s that simple and that brutal. So if we really believe that, we can kiss peace goodbye. They will not” let us be” in our own land peacefully, unless we are ready to defend it if needed!
Unity! “Toruk Macta”! Call me whatever you want. Pick the word that you wish from your twisted already set political dictionary, but unless a nation unites, real peace will never be tasted. And it doesn’t have to be right beneath your feet to be your land. Toruk just had to call the other tribes, and they all responded. They fought, and some of them even died. None of them said it wasn’t their land to defend cause they knew sooner or later it would be.
All what was needed … Toruk!
No chief said he was the master of all. No one fight for the “title” and the “glory”. Because for them, it was not a battle for a medallion, it was a matter of “honor”!
If only there was a real Toruk!
Feminism:
Hehehe! Have you noticed that women were as responsible, as powerful and as deceitful as men? They fought together side by side.
Even women were the “real” spiritual leader for they were the ones who were able to understand the language Eywa, their great “mother”.
As for romance, I’ll only state a quote;
“But I've already chosen. But this woman must also choose me.”
Colors:
Oh my god! Could any motion picture be more colorful? Lots and lots of purple –for me J- , yellow, orange, red, white, blue, and any color that a human eye can actually see was there. Even the characters themselves were colorful, bright, and they were full of “vitality” which was coming out of the energy inside them.
As for humans, they were ugly dull grayish brownish- blocked beings. Machines were pale and plane.
Sets:
I can go here forever! All I can say is what I was thinking while watching;
“If all this beauty can be made by man, how beautiful is heaven?”
·Beas that fly with spiral wings when you touch them.
·Plants that emit bright lights when get near them.
·Grass that glow when you step on.
·Flowers in each and every color that play games with you when you interact with
·Water in all colors and shapes. Waterfalls, mountains, and trees.
·The seeds of Eywa!
Heaven oh heaven!
Flying:
For those who don’t know me, flying is one big dream of mine, literally! When they both flew, I was about to fly off my chair! I kept going and moving with them. I here remember when Rose’s face glowed saying “I’m flying”! Looks like James Cameron shares my own dream of flying. OK Mr. Cameron, in case you needed a real stunt for a flying scene in the future, I’d be glad to do it!
This –flying- is one of the ultimate human dreams that is still beyond reality, once again, our reality as humans, which appears to be a fact that the movie maker insists on reminding us of because we tend to forget a lot.
Music:
Again James Horner! The sensational music was all I needed to call all that with one word … Magic!
Actors and Characters:
I was surprised by Giovanni Ribisi who was the first time to see like that. Bravo!
I hated Stephen Lang’s gut with every cell of my body. Chapeau!
My heart ached when Neytiri cried her dead father.
That 1 minute scene was a complete turn on! For those who think love scenes have to be passionate, I think you can easily watch pure passion from the heart. And guess what? No nudity and no “disgusting” details that devote anything from human emotion. And for those who need to know why I hate most of the love scenes (if love is the right word) in most of the movies, remember this scene!
Spiritual:
This amazing piece of art is all about the real value and size of us humans in this world that we sometimes unfortunately resist.
Allow me to remind you of a scene from titanic. Remember the scene at the beginning of the movie when the machines were starting to work? Remember how amazing this scene was? Right after it, Jack & his friend were watching two tiny fishes hopping above water … and they were ahead of Titanic!
Again, in AVATAR, nature was trying to teach us what our swollen egos refuse to admit and deal with. We are nothing but a part of a huge world that has been going on around us and will keep on doing this with or without us. And the fact that we have the privilege of enjoying this whole wide beautiful world cannot by any means be a reason for us not to be decent enough to respect it. “Gatna seteen neela! “
How the characters used to bond with the different creatures in the movie through their hair was so sensational in a way that only people who had the chance once in their lives to connect with creatures other than people can understand.
They scenes of the prayers were heart breaking and inspirational at the same time. Not to mention the fact of the prayer that was heard, and how, and when!
“See the world we come from: there's no green there. They've killed their mother, and they're going to do the same thing here.”
This movie is about hope, honor, integrity, love and purity of the heart. In this movie a man on a wheel chair flew over mountains and kissed the sky, only when he was ready to die to defend what he had!
It’s all about that deep belief in our internal power, in the right of each one of us to have pride in his history, and to defend his land. It’s about the duty that lies upon all of us towards our small worlds to protect and respect. But only when we are really ready to be “humans enough” to deserve it!
Allow me to choose four, five or even nine men, just as my wildest imagination shall chose.
I’ll pick them with different shapes and sizes, one of them will be dark and the other will be blonde. Tall or maybe short, they are to be Chosen from different denominations, religions, races and nations. And I promise you there will be harmony.
Create a brand new positive law for me, or may be a divine one. Make me a new law under the umbrella of the fatwa and fantasies, those which you unanimously agree on suddenly and without any advance notice.
Those were Saudi journalist Nadine Al Bedair’s words in her article for the Egyptian independent daily newspaper Al Masry Al Youm in her article “Me and my four husbands” on December 11th. She spoke hypothetically about how she would pick them, and she gave examples of how diverse her choices would be. Al Arabiya pointed out that she used all the justifications that men usually use ... more
“When security disappears in married life, and serenity is not accessible, then it is time to do the thing most despised by Allah.” With these words, Mahasen Saber opens her blog, I want a divorce , and then later her online radio station, Divorce Radio. More
Egyptian society has been fighting over abortion for over 10 years. Abortion is still illegal in the country, but there have been many moves to legalize abortion pregnancies that are the result of rape. So after all this fighting, why is there still no result? More
Let’s cut to the point: no matter how hard anyone tries to make it deep and philosophical, the word “beauty pageant” will always refer to looks. As variable and relative the definition of “beautiful” might be for a lot of people, some of those who work as beauticians and fashion experts put standards upon which beauty depends. This is applied in all kinds of beauty pageants, including the 2009 Miss Arab World pageant, a new pageant that is causing lots of controversy.
Back in early 2008, the Hariri Foundation’s Women Empowerment Program wanted to start a national campaign addressing Lebanese society—all its classes, religions, and cultural backgrounds—with one goal: that the idea of “women’s rights” is not a prestigious cliché, but a value and a part in our daily life. So they hired Leo Burnett to do that in a low-cost way that stays away from religious issues. Read More
Last month, Soad Abdel Rassoul from Radio Netherlands published an Arabic translation for a Chinese advertisement targeting Middle East countries. The product? Artificial Virginity Hymen.
The majority of comments on this product have been from men. Interestingly, the only woman to speak out on this issue so far is Abdel Rassoul. Read More
Earlier this month, blogger Eman Al Nafjan posted her feelings about a new campaign in Saudi Arabia. The campaign, which began last month, is called “My guardian knows what’s best for me” and aims to gather one million signatures in support of the kingdom’s status quo in regard to women’s guardianship laws. According to Al Nafjan, two Saudi princesses who support this campaign have started their own websites devoted to the issue.You can find both websites herehere (both are in Arabic).Read More
I’ll cut it short; the story of a woman being abused by her husband doesn’t have a nationality, timing or religion. It’s the same mind games, the same challenges, the same enemies, and mostly, the same way to conquer.
I just want to start by how they met, because it’s really important. Most of the times when I talk to a woman who was once abused by her husband, she keeps on saying “He all of a sudden changed” or “Something must have gotten into him”.
They refuse to admit that they neglected the signs, they wanted to believe they deserve a fairytale, or they never put the possibility into consideration.
This guy in the movie was a typical abuser; calm, steady, persistent and NEVER takes no for an answer.
I don’t want to go a lot through how obvious he was because it will make no one any use. Let’s assume that something really has gotten into him. It happened! The first slap! What would you do?
In the movie, he was caught cheating and when his wife “Slim” – played beautifully by Jennifer Lopez – confronted him and actually had “A SAY” about it, he didn’t like it and he slapped her.
And here comes the most important quote from the movie when he told her:\
“I make the money, so I set the rules!”
That’s right. When you can’t pay for your own bread ladies, don’t expect to pick it up from the supermarket. He’ll pick it up for you and you’ll say “Thank you”, and eat it … gladly!!
But “Slim” didn’t like the rules and she decided to fight. So she went through it all, this battle that is really the same everywhere.
First of all she considered the option of asking police for help, then because she was a “lady” and because she had a daughter, she refused that option;
“He’s the father of my child. I’m not going to put him in jail!”
Then she actually find no other option, so she went there, to find out that all what the police can do – if she agreed to go there with the marks over her body – is to make the bad husband sign a paper that he promises not to do that anymore, otherwise, bad things will happen to him, unless of course he has money … nothing can touch him!
OK! No police, now plan B, she decided to RUN!
The rest of the events in the movie are irrelevant and at some points depended on some Hollywood-style solutions, especially when that secret father popped out of nowhere with all the money she might need.
It all really sums up to this … RUN! Take your kids and just go away!
You will probably have no money, you will probably have no roof, and you may not have the support of your family – especially if you’re from the Middle East”, but you’ll have this power that you don’t know where it’s coming from, that power that will push you to continue.
In that movie, her push was when she saw her daughter scared of her father. The idea of her daughter being in danger was enough for her. I think this can be a very good push for so many of us!
I’m not coming of Disney Land, I know it’s hard. Especially when you can’t feed your children like they were used to, when you can’t afford their original schools, or when the time comes that you don’t have any lead and you just can’t take it anymore.
But let me tell you something,
The taste of first bite you pay for from your own money after you said “No” is just the best taste you will ever have!
Living and knowing that you are fighting for yourself and your children will make it all much easier.
The key in that movie was the fact that she said “No”.
She never thought of what people will say about her, she thought of not being “the woman whose husband beats her up!”
She wasn’t worried about the fact that her daughter might be affected in the future because her parents were divorced; she was worried her daughter might actually watch her mother being beaten up!
She made the choice that by far saved the life of her daughter, saved her from growing up thinking “It’s ok to be beaten up as long as you have a man in your house!” or “It’s that big to be beaten up, it doesn’t mean anything, a man can do anything he wants as long as he pays the bills and puts food on the table” or “Better being beaten up by a man who lives under the same roof as you do, than by living alone with no man!”
She saved her daughter’s life! Can our women one day think the same and take the same choice?
